Biblical Balance or Contrast?

Our third and final Ministry and Marriage seminar was held here in the city of Jos, Nigeria over the span of three evenings. Anita and I were delighted to have over forty people, mostly couples but also some singles, joining us for our sessions.

The event was hosted by the Nigeria Bible Translation Trust (NBTT) that allowed us to use their Hall of Praise for the event. Better yet, they helped us out by running their back-up generator so that we could keep our PowerPoint projector running during the frequent city power outages that occurred.

Jos is located four hour’s drive north of the capital city, Abuja, where we held our first two seminars.

As a result, it is much closer to what Nigerian’s call the northern belt which is where the largest percentage of Muslim’s live. We also learned that people appear here seem to be more impacted by traditional African culture when it comes to practices of marriage and family. Many of our interactive discussion times centered on how to practically apply biblical teaching which is often in stark contrast with common cultural marriage habits.

One participant stated, “When a man pays such a large bride price to marry his wife, the usual attitude is that he has bought her and that she is therefore his possession that he can do with as he pleases. That is why the biblical principle of sacrificial service of husbands toward their wives is such a challenge, even for those engaged in church and ministry work.”

Anita and I have been learning so much about Nigerian culture during this trip. It’s been great receiving affirmation for our seminar and plenty of invitations to return for more training in the future, but we see how what we have offered has only cracked the door open on a truly significant topic of interest and concern Our hope and prayer is that all of those who participated in our seminars will be challenged to continue thinking through just what they many need to do to truly bring biblical balance to their ministry and marriage.

Armed Robbery!

No. It did not occur to Anita and me. But it did happen two nights ago to eight friends of ours, some of whom were our hosts for the Ministry and Marriage seminars we gave in the city of Abuja.

The group of eight were in a hotel having a debrief meeting after a regional gathering for the MANI network. (MANI stands for Movement of Africa National Initiatives.) Several armed men came into their room and forced them to give up money, laptops, iPads, wristwatches and other valuables. Thankfully, none of them were physically harmed, apart from the emotional trauma that such an event produces.

One of our friends, Reuben Ezemadu, was able to slip his cell phone under a sofa and that is how he was able to call for the police afterwards plus send us an email note telling of this tragic incident.

Having been robbed in our home years ago when we lived in Kinshasa, DRC, Anita and I know how abused and violated one feels when something like this occurs. It also has made us realize this country of Nigeria continues to offer huge challenges to anyone wanting to be engaged in active ministry here.

The good news part of this story is that one of the folks had their iPad security system alive and therefore was able to trace exactly where it was a few hours later. The police were able to make a raid on that house and found one of the men with some of the stolen property.

Thanks for all of you who have been praying for our own safety during these two weeks.  We have a day to go before we fly out for Europe and then home.

Under His wings,

Jon

Ministry and Marriage--Nigeria Style!

My wife, Anita, and I have now completed our first full week here in Nigeria and have finished two of three scheduled seminars on balancing ministry and marriage. For me, it’s been a special treat to have Anita accompany me this time, as opposed to working solo as I have the past two years.

The emphasis of our presentation has been to challenge couples involved in ministry work to find biblical balance between the demands of work and the priority of their marriage. We’ve been contrasting perspectives on both of these from current popular culture and Scripture. We’re trying hard not to let our Western cultural biases color our conclusions but, instead, help participants make their own comparisons between traditional Nigerian viewpoints and what the Bible has to say about it.

As a result, we’ve learned so many interesting aspects about traditions and habits here in Nigeria even among couples who are strongly committed to their Christian faith. Here are a few:

·         ***African culture says that men should always be the authoritative and domineering head of the home. Men in ministry struggle with living out this expectation from their extended family along with also knowing the Bible says they should love their wife sacrificially, as Christ loved the church.

*** Nigerian pastors have inherited the role of the tribal high priest, whom everyone venerates with the highest respect and seeks out for all life decisions. As a result, many pastors experience a status of huge respect among their parishioners that sets them apart and easily leads to excesses of pride and self-glorification. 

*** A wife’s expectation of submission to her husband often extends to the extended family as well, meaning that she can be routinely ordered around by her husband’s parents or elder brothers.

All of these realities and many more have led to some stimulating discussion times during our sessions as we’ve attempted to encourage a biblical worldview on both ministry and marriage.

Frequent power outages have impacted our seminars, causing major interruptions in our PowerPoint presentations.  Then there are the heightened security conditions. This has meant that some participants have been delayed up to several hours just trying to get to our meeting venue because of the multiple police checkpoints along the way. In one case, we waited for over an hour to start the session and had only three people there. By the end of the session, however, there were twenty-five!

Tomorrow we will begin our third seminar, this time in the city of Jos that is higher in elevation than Abuja, so the weather is quite comfortable. We’ve learned that announcements have been made on the radio, and posters with our picture have been displayed all over town. So, we’ll see just how many people show up this time. Whatever the case, we’re praying that God brings those who will benefit the most from our seminar and, therefore, become more effective than ever in both their ministry and their marriage.